Skip to main content
Read page text
page 4
HOW WAS IT FOR YOU? January 2024 8: Our FA Cup campaign is off and running, and we breeze past Wigan Athletic at their DW Stadium with some very average performances from our prima donnas – in fact, the only players fit to wear the shirt are still teenagers. 9: Whatever happened to Jesse Lingard… is not a phrase that you hear very often as, to be honest, few people care. Since his contract at Nottingham Forest ended at the end of last season, Lingard has been without a club. With proposed moves to West Ham United, Inter Miami and anybody in the Saudi League all seemingly falling through, Lingard even offered himself to Barcelona in a cunning attempt to make people think he wants to play football. A bit like when you’re signing on and they want to see evidence that you’re applying for jobs, so you show them your applications to GP surgeries, solicitors’ chambers and the circus, despite only two GCSEs and no coordination whatsoever. But when we say few care, there is one person who does, and when seeing an Instagram post of Lingard in a gym in Dubai, his old team-mate Paul Scholes sent him words of a frustrated friend who clearly feels Lingard is throwing his football life away, posting in response: “Are you just gonna fuck about in the gym or are you gonna play football?” Lingard, scorer of great and important goals for United, should reflect. 11: Jadon Sancho has left the building… but maybe only for a few months, as he returns on loan to Borussia Dortmund. If he wants to make a return, which, given his stand-off, would seem to suggest he has no interest in doing, his friend Rashford, who is on thin ice with fans already for seemingly not giving a fuck either, will clearly welcome him back, as when Sancho made a barbed comment towards United of “Good to be back on the pitch” it met with Rashford highlighting it with a “Yesirrrr” and a love heart emoji. He’s not in the business of making friends Good/Bad Good People who were rabidly pro-Qatar and anti-SJR… now praising SJR. Decisive action and impressive work on the CEO front. The Traitors. Lots of shocks in AFCON. The “Prague Zoo” pub crawl. No United games for two weeks = no depression. Days getting longer. Douglas Bagley’s old-school Spurs and AC Milan photos on Twitter. Stick to Football pod. Slow Horses series three. Season five of Fargo. The cold snap for great winter mountaineering. A sleeping dog. Time spent doing little. The evenings are on the way back, slowly but surely. The club being geared up towards helping the team be successful on the pitch. Martial’s contract not being extended. Fans being engaged with face to face. Ham and pea soup. “Omar’s coming.” UWS podcasts continuing to evolve and be original. Lots of exciting albums due out. Dealing with Rashford quickly. Bad Betting on AFCON. Twitter being overrun by middle-aged thirst traps. Gym packed with New Year’s resolutions. Two weeks of awful United clickbait filling up the gap of no United games. One January home game. Icy pavements and gales. Away tickets — low odds of success. January. It lasts forever. The Middle East situation. A stain on humanity. Someone needs to beat them lot and also them lot soon, before the unmentionable starts getting mentioned again. The weather. From freezing to stormy with nothing in between. People who don’t lift their dog’s shit. Anything with Michelle Keegan in it. Watching a football team with no identity. Rashford making another error of judgement. The eye-watering amount the strategic review cost the club while the Glazers’ pockets got fatter. The prospect of no European football this season and potentially next. The away end at Wigan. From the regulars on the Groundside forum of uwsonline.com. Never spotted in the same room together: Pete Boyle and Omar Berrada.
page 5
UNITED WE STAND 344 | 5 1.Anderson was loaned to which Italian club in 2014? 2. Gary Pallister was sold to who in 1998? 3. Daniel James joined United from which club in 2019? 4. What African country does Amad Diallo represent at international level? 5. What were the scores in last season’s two league games against West Ham? Answers on page 30 6. Which former Dutch United keeper is the current goalkeeping coach at Shakhtar Donetsk? 7. Who am I? Zwolle, Cambuur, William II, PSV, United (127 games, one goal), Lazio, Milan, Ajax. 8. In what season did United last face Bristol City in a competitive game? 9. Between 2015 and 2017, Javier Hernandez played in the Bundesliga for which German team? 10. Can you name all six clubs David Moyes has managed professionally? Mad Cyril While still incredibly early days, it seems clear that the new regime under Jim Ratcliffe appears to have way more authority on all aspects of the club than a 25 per cent stake may have suggested. Keeping the Glazers on in any way is far from ideal, of course, but this looked like the only way to get a foot in the door and assert any influence at all. Since it has come to light that the rival bid from Qatar failed to prove sufficient finance anyway, then there was no other choice and, while we may dislike Ratcliffe’s tax avoidance and dubious politics, he has taken more action to improve the club in a few weeks than the Glazers have in nearly 20 years. Appointing Omar Berrada as the new chief executive shows the new regime’s intent to employ the best in class. Some Reds have found old anti-United tweets from Berrada and flagged them up. Personally, I find the allegations of corruption at his two previous clubs, city and Barcelona, slightly more a cause for concern. Berrada believes that any players not deemed a success within two years should be moved on. That should be music to the ears of fans — in the same week we were told Anthony Martial will be out for a further 10 weeks with a groin strain. Will we even notice he isn’t available? All the players and management alike must surely now be feeling the pressure to perform all of a sudden, after working under a rudderless regime doing as they pleased for so long, on astronomical wages they don’t deserve. Shape up or be shipped out. Certain players have become public enemy number one in the eyes of the fans due to lack of work-rate and having ideas above their station, but the general malaise actually applies to most of them. I have watched United for four decades plus and, for the first time, if someone asked me who my favourite player is, I wouldn’t be able to answer, and definitely not because I’m spoiled for choice. Our match-going support have been VERY tolerant with the players and manager; there are no obvious protestations at matches, more an acceptance and apathy. But patience is wearing thin. Lack of effort or, in some cases, players who are simply not good enough. Most of whom are on bumper contracts, so tough decisions will have to be made by the new regime. Bite the bullet and write off millions to make a statement? Time will tell. The manager must be feeling this also. During the disastrous start to the campaign, was there anybody at the club to make a decision? To pull him up on our lack of tactics? How are we outplayed week in, week out by inferior players who simply look like they are coached better? Why the same schoolboy mistakes, game after game? Once the off-field recruitment is all put into place, then it will be the on-field. Players and management have got time to plead their case, but will they have long enough? with us, is he? 12: In a world full of madness and sadness there’s some good news, with the celebration around ex-Liverpool striker Sadio Mane’s marriage. The 31-year-old has wedded his long-term girlfriend in a ceremony in Dakar. He is now returning to the Africa Cup of Nations, and she’s going back to school as she’s only 18. Long-term girlfriend…. 13: Reading emulate our efforts of a couple of years back by getting their game called off against Port Vale – abandoned after thousands of supporters stormed the pitch in the 16th minute in protest against club owner Dai Yongge. Fans have protested throughout the season, setting up the “Sell Before We Dai” group. Tennis balls had been thrown in the opening minute of the game, which caused a delay, but once the 16th minute came (the amount of points the club has been deducted under Dai Yongge) thousands of fans ran on and got the game abandoned. The game will be replayed, and a suspended three-point deduction applied should any more games be called off. 14: Tottenham come to Old Trafford and gain a draw they seem more pleased with than we are. 15: Everton and Nottingham Forest have been charged for breaking financial rules, and both face a points deduction. So why just these two teams? Richard Masters, Prem boss, was asked whether big clubs were treated differently to others when it came to the league’s PSR. “The standard directions [on PSR] are for everybody, they’re not just for the small clubs,” he answered. That’s nine-times league title-winners Everton, double European Cup winners Nottingham Forest. “Small clubs”? 16: Jose Mourinho has been sacked by Roma; a fourth defeat to Lazio in six marking the end of a love affair with the fans of the club. And at last a date has been set for city to answer charges for their alleged 115 misdemeanours. When? You’re not allowed to know. So why the delay when other clubs are punished? Because the other clubs have “co-operated” and were found guilty (though still deny it and have

Page Text

View plaintext

HOW WAS IT FOR YOU?

January 2024 8: Our FA Cup campaign is off and running, and we breeze past Wigan Athletic at their DW Stadium with some very average performances from our prima donnas – in fact, the only players fit to wear the shirt are still teenagers. 9: Whatever happened to Jesse Lingard… is not a phrase that you hear very often as, to be honest, few people care. Since his contract at Nottingham Forest ended at the end of last season, Lingard has been without a club. With proposed moves to West Ham United, Inter Miami and anybody in the Saudi League all seemingly falling through, Lingard even offered himself to Barcelona in a cunning attempt to make people think he wants to play football. A bit like when you’re signing on and they want to see evidence that you’re applying for jobs, so you show them your applications to GP surgeries, solicitors’ chambers and the circus, despite only two GCSEs and no coordination whatsoever. But when we say few care, there is one person who does, and when seeing an Instagram post of Lingard in a gym in Dubai, his old team-mate Paul Scholes sent him words of a frustrated friend who clearly feels Lingard is throwing his football life away, posting in response: “Are you just gonna fuck about in the gym or are you gonna play football?” Lingard, scorer of great and important goals for United, should reflect. 11: Jadon Sancho has left the building… but maybe only for a few months, as he returns on loan to Borussia Dortmund. If he wants to make a return, which, given his stand-off, would seem to suggest he has no interest in doing, his friend Rashford, who is on thin ice with fans already for seemingly not giving a fuck either, will clearly welcome him back, as when Sancho made a barbed comment towards United of “Good to be back on the pitch” it met with Rashford highlighting it with a “Yesirrrr” and a love heart emoji. He’s not in the business of making friends

Good/Bad

Good People who were rabidly pro-Qatar and anti-SJR… now praising SJR. Decisive action and impressive work on the CEO front. The Traitors. Lots of shocks in AFCON. The “Prague Zoo” pub crawl. No United games for two weeks = no depression. Days getting longer. Douglas Bagley’s old-school Spurs and AC Milan photos on Twitter. Stick to Football pod. Slow Horses series three. Season five of Fargo. The cold snap for great winter mountaineering. A sleeping dog. Time spent doing little. The evenings are on the way back, slowly but surely. The club being geared up towards helping the team be successful on the pitch. Martial’s contract not being extended. Fans being engaged with face to face. Ham and pea soup. “Omar’s coming.” UWS podcasts continuing to evolve and be original.

Lots of exciting albums due out. Dealing with Rashford quickly.

Bad Betting on AFCON. Twitter being overrun by middle-aged thirst traps. Gym packed with New Year’s resolutions. Two weeks of awful United clickbait filling up the gap of no United games. One January home game. Icy pavements and gales. Away tickets — low odds of success. January. It lasts forever. The Middle East situation. A stain on humanity. Someone needs to beat them lot and also them lot soon, before the unmentionable starts getting mentioned again. The weather. From freezing to stormy with nothing in between. People who don’t lift their dog’s shit. Anything with Michelle Keegan in it. Watching a football team with no identity. Rashford making another error of judgement. The eye-watering amount the strategic review cost the club while the Glazers’ pockets got fatter. The prospect of no European football this season and potentially next.

The away end at Wigan. From the regulars on the Groundside forum of uwsonline.com.

Never spotted in the same room together: Pete Boyle and Omar Berrada.

read next page

My Bookmarks

Buy this Book
Skip to main content