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Phoenix Humour MMP February £7.99 176pp 978 1 7802 2736 8 eBook: £7.99 / 978 1 7802 2737 5

The Four Essential Messages For our training programme to be successful, the dog must learn and integrate into his view of you, himself, and the whole universe, the Four Essential Messages. They are: 1. You are beautiful , intelligent, talented and wonderful. 2. You are naive, unrealistic and a fool. 3. No one will love you as much as I do. 4. When you die, they’re going to have to bury me with you.

THE RABBIS OF THE BOCA RATON THEOLOGICAL SEMINARY & ELLIS WEINER, BARBARA DAVILMAN How to Raise a Jewish Dog

You don't have to own a dog and you don't have to be Jewish... A humour title about using guilt, shame and passive aggression to raise your dog that will have you barking with laughter. ‘A “Not Missing Yet” sign informs neighbours that a dog is not missing. Some trainers call this precaution unnecessary. We say: It couldn’t hurt.’ Finally! The Rabbis of the Boca Raton Theological Seminary have made their dog-training techniques available in book form. Look out, monks. Step aside, whisperer. Rabbi Monica and Rabbi Alan show, step by step, how you can use Situational Martyrdom and Conditional Unconditional Love to create an unbreakable bond with your dog. Perfect for fans of How To Tell If Your Cat Is Planning to Kill You. Ellis Weiner has edited National Lampoon and contributed to The New Yorker.

Barbara Davilman is a writer for television and movies. They co-authored the bestselling Yiddish with Dick and Jane.

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Location: Los Angeles, USA Available for Interview www.ellisweiner.com f/Ellis Weiner f/Barbara Davilman @EllisWeiner @LABABS

Non-Fiction/Humour • February 2014