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• WHITE PEOPLE KERSTIN ARIAS, 24 BEND, OREGON A lot of people thought this was a pro-ally group [the Central Oregon Diversity Project, which Arias leads alongside Josie Stanfield]. That this was about giving white people a chance to show that they’re not racist. And then once they saw what we really deal with, and they kind of got a taste of it, they just didn’t want to do it no more. We just had one here lately where, you know, this woman didn’t like the fact that a woman of color was yelling at cops. We eventually did have a conversation, which was: You don’t understand the hurt and anger that we carry on our shoulders—four hundred years of oppression that weighs down on our shoulders. We’re angry, and we have every right to be angry. It’s not your job to tell them that they need to sit down and shut up. It’s the other way around—you need to sit down and shut up and listen. So she went and made a whole Facebook post, and she wrote it to Josie personally and said, “You’re more Malcolm X. And I supported Martin Luther King.” She doesn’t realize saying something like that is racist. Like, “Oh, you’re not a good enough Black person. I don’t support you.” It’s like, if we’re not the good little quiet Black girls that they’re hoping to see and we’re the angry Black women, they don’t want to hear it. And we’re no longer good enough for them. So, you know, I think doing all this has shown me the colors of people who consider themselves allies. ALSA BRUNO, 30 SAN FRANCISCO I kept showing up to different demonstrations and there was one particular moment when I thought, “This is just not for me. I shouldn’t be here.” Well… I’m a big-chested guy. You know what I mean? I’m a big-chested Black man. So I know that when I go into spaces, if I’m not actively smiling, there’ll be a little bit of like, “What’s his goal? What’s he gonna do?” 63
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And I remember going to this event right at city hall. I believe the mayor was speaking, at some point—London Breed—a Black woman, right? And I thought, cool, this will be—at the very least, we know it’s a Black woman who’s the emcee, who’s the main speaker. When we got to the event, there was an eight-minute-46-second moment of silence. It was sort of sparsely attended. But I remember this young Black kid who had a blue bandanna on his head, mask on his face, and a homemade shield, a police shield. And I believe it said, “Police, stop killing us”—each word had its own line. And people are walking up and taking pictures of him. Like, left and right. And when I say people, I mean white people. Like, we were at this event, it’s sparsely attended. The Black mayor is going to speak and weigh in on what this city is doing and this crisis, this seven-layer cake of death that we’re in. And look, no one spoke to the boy. No one asked him if they could do it. They just walked up, stood from a certain distance. I saw one person put themselves in the picture, which to me felt like, you are literally… like this is—what a, what a pun! What an example of what this moment is! Like, you’re not in the picture. Like, you’re being a bystander in this shit. And you’re pimping his Blackness, you’re pimping his voice, I don’t know, to get an extra follow on Instagram or some shit, like it makes you look woke, because you saw a Black man, which is… that’s how I feel when I see—God, I’m mad, I’m so sorry—that’s how I feel when I see these videos and everyone gets so excited about it. NILES SCHWARTZ, 41 MINNEAPOLIS The anger here is justified, and yet, honestly, also alarming. A lot of friends and acquaintances—all of whom are white—want, or say they want, a violent overthrow of the current system. Some other friends—who are otherwise far left—who have voiced skepticism about the idea of clandestine lynchings or how the police are supposedly psyopsing us with fireworks, have either been ostracized and unfriended or unfollowed by peers. While things have calmed down, the city simmers with fear of white supremacists watching them, while in the suburbs I visit my gullible relatives, in fear of anarchists and looters branching out of the city. All of this then has this underlying element of 64

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WHITE PEOPLE

KERSTIN ARIAS, 24

BEND, OREGON

A lot of people thought this was a pro-ally group [the Central Oregon Diversity Project, which Arias leads alongside Josie Stanfield]. That this was about giving white people a chance to show that they’re not racist. And then once they saw what we really deal with, and they kind of got a taste of it, they just didn’t want to do it no more. We just had one here lately where, you know, this woman didn’t like the fact that a woman of color was yelling at cops. We eventually did have a conversation, which was: You don’t understand the hurt and anger that we carry on our shoulders—four hundred years of oppression that weighs down on our shoulders. We’re angry, and we have every right to be angry. It’s not your job to tell them that they need to sit down and shut up. It’s the other way around—you need to sit down and shut up and listen. So she went and made a whole Facebook post, and she wrote it to Josie personally and said, “You’re more Malcolm X. And I supported Martin Luther King.” She doesn’t realize saying something like that is racist. Like, “Oh, you’re not a good enough Black person. I don’t support you.” It’s like, if we’re not the good little quiet Black girls that they’re hoping to see and we’re the angry Black women, they don’t want to hear it. And we’re no longer good enough for them. So, you know, I think doing all this has shown me the colors of people who consider themselves allies.

ALSA BRUNO, 30

SAN FRANCISCO

I kept showing up to different demonstrations and there was one particular moment when I thought, “This is just not for me. I shouldn’t be here.” Well… I’m a big-chested guy. You know what I mean? I’m a big-chested Black man. So I know that when I go into spaces, if I’m not actively smiling, there’ll be a little bit of like, “What’s his goal? What’s he gonna do?”

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